Eating.

It seems like I have been doing allot of it these past few days. Although my lot compared to what it used to be is nothing much at all. But I have been feeling kinda guilty about it, so that must mean I am doing something bad. I really need to start making a food journal but I have enough trouble remembering everything I have to do now let alone adding one more thing to my good intentions list. Anyways, I have been eating what seems like too much and and I have been getting a few tummy aches, nauseousness and just plain old crappy feeling. I have even felt like I am having stomach ulcer pain as well as my gall bladder has been acting up some. I really have kinda expected the gall bladder stuff as they should have taken it out when I had the surgery done originally but that is a whole other story and well I certainly am not a doctor nor did I get to see my insides so I have no idea whether they made a better decision or not.


Well anyways I am not sure what to think about my eating . As here is what I ate yesterday and it seems or at least felt like I ate way too much.. What do you think?


1 Protein shake in the am
1-1/2"x1-1/2" square of spinach pie
2 inch piece of chicken pita w/mayo
1 cracker
about 10 sunchips - garden salsa flavored
3oz of meat loaf with some baby roasted baby red potatoes with mushrooms and onions
2 piece of sugar free licorice.


That is it, I guess it is not really too bad as far as amounts but maybe it is the kind of food that is what is bothering me. Not to mention I also made a huge mistake in finding all that sugar free candy stuff. I should have just bought one bag and that is it.. But NOOOOO I had to buy a bunch of different kinds and rather then save it for my protein ice cream treat I had to sample them all. And let me tell you that did NOT work out to my advantage, having just one piece a day is fine but the having 5 or 6 pieces is not a good recipe. I have totally learned my lesson on eating too much of those Sunday/Monday night and will not make that mistake again.


I also have gone way off track with weighing myself. I am so wanting to be able to say that I am down over a 100lbs that I keep weighing myself everyday and I am only driving myself crazy doing that. The scale is fluctuating so badly. At night I will be down 3 lbs and the next morning I will have gained 4.. It is making me nuts and I need to stop!!! but I am basically hovering at the same 96lbs so I am thinking I must be at a stall.. But being at that 100lb mark is something that I just can't get out of my head.. You would think that being so obsessed with it would make me eat less then it has but I guess my mind just does not work the way it should...lol I am thinking that I will never, ever have to worry about having any eating disorders.


Well I guess I need to get moving. My mind is going a mile a minute and I need to get back to focusing on my work.. Sorry the post is so jumbled today ..



Take care, Mechele